Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Bankruptcy: To be or not to be

In Uncategorized on August 31, 2009 at 3:29 pm

So. Lots has happened. Most for the worse… but that’s the usual, so I guess not much has happened, in a way.

Does anyone have legitimate experience with bankruptcy or financial difficulty? I’m finding it IMPOSSIBLE to figure all this crap out because there is a wealth of information, most irrelevant and nearly all spam. I am not at a point where I can pay for advice (who is when it comes to this?!) and especially when most of it is spam.

There’s gotta be REAL people out there who go through the same kinds of experience. So, where are you?

Obviously, this is a rather vague request, but I don’t know where to turn or who to divulge information to and I’m dying here. Have you dealt with financial difficulty? Where did you turn?



Read All About It

In Politics and Other Nonsense, Uncategorized on April 28, 2009 at 8:14 pm


To the dear, old newspaper,

Why do you feel you are in competition with the internet? Is it because, like American car manufacturers, you were unwilling to change when the consumers had moved beyond you? You aren’t elected officials. You are businesses. You are supposed to be ahead of us. You are supposed to move, at the very least, with our demands.

Newspaper. I just don’t get you. Who is calling your shots (besides the advertisers)? Why don’t you hire creative people who know business, interwebs, and marketing, and stop laying there like yesterday’s Zubaz?

Sometimes things go out of style. And if those companies thought they’d grow and grow forever and they’d never have to change a thing… well, those companies fail. Why? Because they’re stupid. You have to be flexible. Madonna’s not still cranking out her 80’s pop. She moved on. Because if you don’t, well, you become lots of people that I don’t remember the names of anymore.

Can’t you get more specific with your online ads? I don’t like that you’re run by ads, but I don’t want you to be run by the government either. I don’t know what to do with you!

Ok. Let’s say you had a great story and someone emailed it to me. When I click on the link, instead of making me fill out a bunch of bullshit, just have one question. Like, what’s my gender? I answer, you let me in to the article and people who wanted to advertise to me get to do so. Then, let’s say you’ve done a great job of suggesting other stories to me on your site. And I click on one. Then I have to answer another question. Like my age range. Or what I feel is the most pressing political issue. Or whether I’m a dog person or cat person.

I don’t care. The point is, make it simple for me, you, and your advertisers. The smarter you are with your site, the longer you keep me on it, the more money you make. And the more you can charge. If I really love you, I’ll follow you and you may be able to get more information from me. But if you’re going to be a jackass, well, I don’t owe you anything. If I’m stupid with my business, I fail. So I don’t really feel sorry for you. I feel sorry for me. And everyone else. Because we could really use journalism around here.

The great thing about this internet thing is that you can suggest your past articles to me, too. You currently can’t do this with your old papery ways. You can make money off of things you’ve ALREADY DONE. Or you can make a deal with a sister paper’s article. You have so many choices here.

So. Get off your lazy ass. The internet is a great opportunity for you. You’re missing it.


Someone who is apparently smarter than you

P.S. The interwebs are generally cheaper and less wasteful than your paper-ways. You should like that.

P.P.S. Bloggers are getting pretty strong followings. It’s because they’re changing and growing. They’re not still wearing Zubaz.

Ch-ch-ch-ch- Oh, Fuck it.

In Uncategorized on March 31, 2009 at 11:25 pm

Major changes happening. Some I want. Some are the furthest thing from what I could ever want.

I don’t believe that things will just come together, because I look at history and make logical conclusions. However, I do believe that making strong choices can lead to strong results. In whichever direction, but I’d rather have a firm no than a maybe, so there we be.

So. Major change. Major decisions. And action. Inactivity is not acceptable. No more waiting out the storm. Stand out in the rain or cower. That’s it. Do or die time.

I wish I didn’t think of death as the easier choice. *Sigh* So dramatic and pathetic, I know.

It’s not really death I want. Just a nap. Or some time off. When that’s not on the horizon and there isn’t rest to look forward to, it’s easy to defect to PLEASE LET ME SLEEP in whatever way that is possible.

I’m working on it. At least I’m semi-self aware. Or is that what makes this painful…

Blah blah blah.

Time for action.

Pony Up

In My Gift to You, Thing of the Day, Uncategorized on March 21, 2009 at 7:12 pm
I heart this band.

I heart this band.

I love this band. There are a million quotable lyrics, but I’m sharing the ones below because I feel like it.

‘Cause I got a story that won’t leave my head
‘Bout a girl who can stomach whatever she’s fed
Are there any words harder than the ones we just said?

Pony Up myspace page

United States of Tara

In My Gift to You, Thing of the Day, Uncategorized on March 20, 2009 at 9:03 am

I like it. A lot.

I watched the first episode and was a little skeptical. First of all, I thought there was too much background information and explanation. It turns out, it just wasn’t set up as well as it could have been. For instance, I was thinking “why are they talking like that? Don’t they deal with this all the time?”

It wasn’t until later that they revealed Tara was going off her meds. Or maybe I missed something? Regardless, I didn’t get that we were seeing these alters for the first time and in some cases, so were the characters in the show. However, they were familiar with some of the alters, so this wasn’t consistent. Messy start, but it gets much better.

Anyway, my main problem (and solution) is that I don’t have a TV. I watched UST illegally online. If Showtime were smart, they’d figure out a way for those of us who want to watch TV exclusively online to somehow subscribe to them via the interwebs. Or even better, subscribe to individual shows. I don’t want to watch the shows I really love illegally, but I’m not going to buy a TV, so you need to catch up. However, keep in mind that I’m very broke. But very loyal. Feel free to contact me about us loyal TV-haters, but loyal TV-followers. I will charge you a consulting fee, but I have a ton of information for you.

And I want to bite John Corbett. Yum.

The Dog Shat Money

In Thing of the Day, Uncategorized on March 19, 2009 at 8:30 pm
Giving new meaning to the phrase 'Five dollar foot long'

Giving new meaning to the phrase 'Five dollar foot long'

I was walking a dog for a client. The dog pooped. There was money in the poo. Unfortunately, it was only part of a five dollar bill. I’m desperate, but not that desperate. I don’t think it was legal tender at this point.

I’m going to be walking him next week as well. I’m hoping by then he’s learned how to produce intact hundos.

My problems may be over very soon. Stay tuned.

No Rest for the Wicked

In Uncategorized on March 10, 2009 at 1:47 am

So. Here I am. Not sleeping. Again.

Saturday I didn’t sleep. Sunday I slept five hours. Now it’s Monday night/Tuesday morning and once again, I’m not sleeping. < sarcasm >Tuesday is going to rock. < / sarcasm >

I’ve always been an insomniac. And I really do mean always. As a kid, I could never fall asleep. I’d be up all night. My mother would dress me for school while I slept because I’d be too exhausted to wake up. I never got up early to watch cartoons. Not once.

I’ve worked early morning jobs. I’ve tried everything there is to try to get into a routine. Or to relax at night. Or to feel energized in the morning. None of it has ever worked.

All of that said, I know why I’m not sleeping tonight. While I am prone to this sort of thing anyway, tonight I’m having a hard time because I’m failing at life.

I’ll spend the next 6 hours working and not sleeping. I’ll accomplish a ton of things on my to do list. However, I know that I’m still going to lose my business. I know that I’m going to have to file for bankruptcy. I know that I’ll give it my best and it won’t be good enough.

This is the first month that I won’t be paying a number of my bills. I don’t feel anything for the institutions I owe money to, but it still hurts. It kills me. I work hard. I work 7 days a week and have since the age of 14. I often work two or three jobs at any given time. I’ve always had a good credit score, not because I’ve ever been in good financial standing, but because I know how to make sacrifices.

There’s nothing left to sacrifice.

Except, I guess, sleep.

So here it goes. Sleep, you’ve been thrown into the volcano. And yet, somehow I know the gods still won’t be pleased with me.

I’m going to be Hott

In The Bright Side, Uncategorized on March 5, 2009 at 9:24 pm

So I like to think of the glass as half full.

Which is why I’m looking forward to being super model skinny without the psychological burden of having anorexia.

Being poor has SO many perks! I can’t wait to see the results of going down to one meal a day. AWESOME.


Laid Off

In Politics and Other Nonsense, Uncategorized on March 3, 2009 at 6:03 pm

Three more members of my family were laid off yesterday. It’s only Tuesday and my family isn’t all that big. They got one week’s notice (well, four working days, really). Next week, they don’t have jobs to go to.

At this rate, it looks like none of my family will have jobs by the end of next week.

Apocalypse? If you were thinking of coming any time soon, can you speed it up a little? I’d rather bite it quickly than starve to death or be eaten by other hungrier, more capitalist Americans.

Obama Wants You to Get Wasted

In Uncategorized on February 13, 2009 at 8:52 pm
I hope free martini's are in the stimulus package. I'll take five mango obamartini's, por favor.

I hope free martini's are in the stimulus package. I'll take five mango obamartini's, por favor.

Is there no end to the historic merchandising and marketing opportunities? This is one of roughly eleventy million Obama-related signs I’ve seen in Chicago. I wish I had a picture of the one that said something about buying pants. No joke. There was a store window telling me that Obama would like me to buy a pair of pants. Not just any pants would suffice, I’m sure. The pants that were for sale in their store on that day were the ones that Barack wanted me to purchase. I didn’t purchase them. This is probably why we’re still in an economic crisis. Such a chicken and egg. How was I supposed to purchase them without money? I spoke of my pants dilemma earlier. It’s not that I don’t want to buy those pants, President Obama. Really. It’s not.

While I did not stop in to get an Obamartini, I wouldn’t mind if getting wasted became a national mandate. At least until this crisis is over. I’m thirsty. And anxiety-ridden. Can we get a vodka stimulus up in here?